Being single can sometimes be a challenge. What makes it hard is that in our minds this should be a temporary phase. So long as we’re single, we live our lives in transition wondering about the future. We’re not settled, we’re stuck in ‘in-between’ time, and this can make us anxious. Anxious people tend to be terrible decision makers, especially women who are anxious about this very topic. Anxiety about being single can cause us to rush into relationships or keep us from ending bad ones. We have plans and hopes and dreams–and that’s good and natural, but we shouldn’t be so attached to them that we become sad when things don’t go as planned. Sometimes, we can be our own worst enemies when it comes to our happiness.
When we wrestle with the idea that things should not be as they are, we should remember that we have a Father who loves us. Abandonment to divine providence. That’s the key to lasting peace and happiness whether we are single or not. As simple and trite as it sounds, all we need to do is accept God’s will. This does not mean that things should not change or that we should give up what we hope for. Our desires are not meaningless. When we accept God’s will, we are not accepting the will of a tyrannical God or a stranger who will have His way. Rather, we are accepting the will of someone who cares more for us than we would ever know. We don’t have to resign to God’s will, we can embrace it with joy. We do this not merely because we want to be generous with God, but because we know that he is our Father. The realization that we are children of God should have a real impact on our lives. We should have the cheerful optimism and trusting simplicity of little children.
Because we so easily forget, trusting in God is something that we need to continually maintain. This is our daily cross, to see all the events and circumstances of our day with a supernatural outlook and believe with St. Paul, “that all things work unto good for those who love God.”
“Obviously, an active faith is necessary to see in all things God’s hand—but the just man liveth by faith. And it may be admitted that there are times when one’s faith may have to be exercised by a vigorous and deliberate effort…the pain and the sorrow inflicted upon us or upon those we love by special trials are so keen, that we find it hard to convince ourselves that God ‘knows what He is doing’…There are many flowers in our life that seem of great value to us. In God’s sight, they are only flowers, and in His mercy, He removes them that we may yield Him fruit. He alone knows the deep desires of our hearts, and He alone can satisfy them. We must trust Him absolutely if we wish to achieve our heart’s desire.”
“The whole trouble is that—literally—we do not know what is good for us; and what makes the trouble still worse is that we think we do. We have our own plans for our happiness and too often we merely regard God as somebody who will help us to accomplish them. The true state of affairs is just the opposite. God has his plans for our happiness, and He is waiting for us to help Him accomplish them.”
Let us never forget, or better yet, let us keep remembering, “We cannot improve on God’s plan for our happiness.”
Let us pray, My body prefers one thing, my mind another, and my heart another, yet I desire nothing but the perfect accomplishment of Your will.
Quotes from This Tremendous Lover by Eugene Boylan
Image from Deivika’s Photobucket